The 45-year-old: Part 2

I met and exchanged phone numbers with this really interesting, cool drummer guy who I had great chemistry with, and about half a day later he texted me. He didn’t even play the waiting game!

After exchanging a few texts, he called me. Called me, you guys. I LOVE THAT. I love when men are men and not boys. And yeah, I think real men call women. When he called, he didn’t waste a ton of time shooting the shit. He said he’d been wanting to check out a comedy show and wanted to know if I wanted to come with. How cool, right? He didn’t say, “so.. uh.. like you wanna get beers maybe sometime this week?” He specified a day, a place and an activity. I’m was impressed to say the least. Needless to say, I agree and we plan to go out Wednesday. 

Tinder musings

I find it really hard to take vegan men seriously. 

It’s a personal choice, highly admirable. Takes a lot of dedication. But I just want a man who like red meat. Sorry buddy. *left*

Lonely in the city

Usually I’m super content to fly solo, but this week I’m feeling really lonely. And really, not even in a romantic sense. I just miss my family. Like crazy. 

The 45-year-old: Part 1

So let’s go back to the beginning before we get to the date. 

I met this guy in real life. Yep, you heard me: IN REAL LIFE. Can you believe it?! That still happens. 

I went to a backyard BBQ on the west side of Chicago that was absolutely brilliant. The food was amazing, the weather was great and the company was fantastic, even before I met this tall drummer. It was just one of those nights that makes you think, “damn, this is what ‘summer memories’ are made of.”

So as I am enjoying the cocktails and authentic Spanish food, my friend (who had invited me to the party) brings over this tall guy and introduces us. We all three chatted for a few and then she left us to chat. It was really one of those class “hit it off” conversations. 

There was plenty of friendly banter, lots of laughter and a bit of substance. We stood and chatted for about 30 minutes, I’d say, before he had to go inside to play the drums in the band that was playing at the party. I told you this party was rad. 

If you know me, you know I dig drummers. Really, I dig any instrument players, but the drums keep the beat and I love the beat. So anyways, I just had this amazing conversation with this super tall babe, he leaves to go play the drums. I’m hoping to myself that he enjoyed the conversation as much as I did. Like I’ve said a million times, it’s not all that often that I meet someone I find interesting. 

I sauntered around the party talking to everyone and enjoying the music. After the band was done, I saw him walk back outside and was hoping that he’d come chat with me again, but that didn’t happen. I found myself sitting around a fire talking with other really awesome people, so I mean, I really wasn’t fretting but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t on my mind. 

My friends and I decided to head home, and he had still yet to come talk to me again. I mean, I was thinking to myself, “I could not have completely misread that situation. We had great conversation, good chemistry and laughed a lot.” 

You know me, rather than letting a potentially great opportunity pass me by, I took matters into my own hands…. kind of. Before we left, I went over and said it was great to meet him. If at that point, he’d not have asked for my number, I’d have let it lie. I’m only willing to do so much of the legwork. 

Fortunately for me, he felt the same and he said, and I quote, “it was great to meet you. We should exchange contact information.” To which I said, “um, did you just ask for my contact information? What would you like? My fax number? Street address? or maybe you’d just like my phone number?” Like I said, we had great conversation with lots of banter. I had to take the chance to poke a little fun! 

So I gave him my number… and that was that. 

She dates Chicago.

You can say I am officially back on the horse. Well, don’t read too much into that, because I haven’t been riding anything as of late… except bikes around the city… but yes, I’m back on the dating train. 

I know, I know I keep saying that, but then I keep getting irritated. I know all you women can relate. It’s like, “whoa, I should totally be dating.” Then it’s like, “whoa, ew, nah, no thanks, rather be chillin’ with a book and wine at home.” It’s a tough little world out there… 

Dating is actually not bad at all for me if I meet people in real life, but that just never ever happens. Well, hardly. It does… sometimes. But when it happens… they are 45, but that’s a story for another day.

I’d date this entire town if the men would ask me out IRL. I really just don’t love this whole Tinder, Hinge, other phone apps for dating. It’s just not that feasible for me. 

It’s tough enough for me to meet a man who is gutsy enough in person, let’s think about how much harder it is to meet a ballsy man through a phone app. Yeah, it’s kind of hard. 

Either way, I’m back in the game. I gotta find me a man with cable so I can lounge on his couch and watch football on Sundays.

Shouldn’t a 45-year-old know how to kiss by now?

Literally on repeat.

My first Tinder date

My, my, my. How I have neglected you since my move to Chicago. 

That will happen when you uproot your life completely and go try and establish a new one in a new city. A new amazing city, I may add. 

So remember why I started this in the first place? So that I would actually date rather than just roll my eyes at men who approach me? Well… it’s become abundantly clear by my absolute lack of potential mates that I need to reignite my dating blog flame. 

First, let’s start with my first Tinder date ever. 

So, you guys know me. I tell anyone everything all the time. So, I have drinks with my co-workers and friends before heading down to Revolution Brewing for my date. This isn’t like the time I got wasted before a first date though, I really only had one or two. 

So I walk into this bar.. I’ve never been there as I’m new in town. I walk in, I say I’m meeting someone, and I don’t know if they are here yet. It’s always so weird. Do I text and say “hey, I’m here?” or do I not. Can someone tell me what protocol is? Anyways, she said well what do they look like? To which I respond, “Umm…. I’m not really sure, I know he has really nice eyelashes.” Then she says, “Is this a tinder date?” And I’m like “OMG, yes, it is.. it’s my first one!” 

So as I stand there talking to this girl about tinder dates, in this gentleman walks. I recognized him immediately from those eyelashes… THOSE EYELASHES. I told him that I just told the hostess that we were on a Tinder date, and she assured us that she was going to try to help us get seated quickly. 

We went upstairs and grabbed some beers. It was pretty jammed… the wait was supposed to be around 45 minutes. Each time the hostess passed us she would do the “thumbs up/thumbs down?” motion. She was awesome. We only had to wait about 20 minutes before she found us a table. 

Our conversation was good. I never can do first date conversation very well. We ended up talking about abortion, healthcare reform, and how his mom once gave away his dog without him ever saying goodbye. For your info, he’s never forgotten this act, but he has forgiven her. 

So essentially, our date was good. I was having fun, we were laughing, everything was great, and I was going to go out with him again. Even though he wasn’t exactly my type. I forgot to mention that aside from the eyelashes, he was bald (which I kind of dig!) but he was wearing skinny jeans which is really not for me. Well, actually… it is for me. It isn’t for my potential boyfriend. 

But anyways, so here’s where it all went downhill. I had to leave to go meet a friend, so he was like, “oh, let me walk you to the train station!” I thought that was great! Ok.. now is when it goes downhill. No sooner do we take one half step out of the restaurant, he whips out a cigarette. (Oh, also, we talked about how I hate cigarette smoking in our conversation) I was like eh, couldn’t you have waited? Like I mean… 4 more minutes? 

Props to him for not making me sit and wait while he stepped out during the date, but it was just a total turn off. Then…. 

After the date, I really started to kind of analyze his behavior — you know, like everyone always does. Then I started to kind of tick off these boxes of his odd behavior… he was really twitchy, really talkative, sitting on his hands, rocking back and forth, etc. So upon further analysis, I think he was high on some sort of something…. 

Needless to say at this point, I never answered his call again. I know that’s a chicken shit move, and I shouldn’t do it, but I just couldn’t. 

So anyways, that’s my first Tinder date. I’ll tell you about my other two soon… and then I guess I’ll start going on more. 

What should I do? 20 dates in 20 weeks again? 

MARK MY WORDS

I will not have my wedding music censored.

Because this is where I’m sitting.